Conversations ...er, monologues by GIRL on Halloween Eve

I'm going to be a owl. But, I'm not going to say "HOO." I'm not going to be a real owl. I'm going to be a pretend owl. So, I'm not going to say, "HOO." A real owl says, "HOO." I am going to knock on the door and then I'm going to say, "Hello, trick-or-treat. Then they're going to give me candy and I'm going to say, Thank-you."

Daddy, daddy, we made Jack-o-lanterns! One is a happy one and one is a sad one. No scary ones.

Mommy, the jack-o-lantern fell off the porch. Mommy, the jack-o-lantern fell off the porch. Mommy, the jack-o-lantern fell off the porch.

GIRL, if this jack-o-lantern falls off the porch one more time, the jack-0-lantern is going in time out [forever!]. (And Mommy is going to run away to a place where they serve chilled margaritas and kiss your ass because you were brave enough to have children.)

Mommy, I don't want to be an owl. I want to be a cow girl.

{This Mommy is DEFINITELY going to run away to a place where they serve chilled margaritas, kiss your ass because you were brave enough to have children and give you your own stash of Halloween candy.}

So, tomorrow night we're in for a small girl with a feather boa or a small girl with a cowgirl hat. Personally, I'm rooting for the boa.

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