Friday, January 18, 2008

Your children choose you

I went out to meet a few girlfriends tonight to discuss "The Mists of Avalon." I've got about 70 more pages to go... I wish I had read this in my 20's. I think it would have resonated with me differently. My friend, who read it for the first time in her 20's, said it was a real coming of age story for her. And obviously for so many others. It is a book that always elicits effusive comments. I'm picking "Eat, Pray, Love" to read next. I also want to read "Raising Cain," which is a book about raising boys.

I still can't get over the fact that when I come home at night, I have two small children asleep in my house. And they are my children. There exists a belief that your children choose you to be their parents before they are born. I like that idea. And it is amazing to me that the very things that are challenging to me, that I have to work on, are served up on a platter by my children. There are no accidents. I have much to learn.


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11 comments:

  1. i love the idea that my children chose me.... i too look at them at times and am in awe that they are mine. i don't think that ever goes away...

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  2. i love the idea that my children chose me.... i too look at them at times and am in awe that they are mine. i don't think that ever goes away...

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  3. You are so spot on. My daughter is becoming like I was at her age and that brings up so much; makes me face things I wouldn't face without her.

    I think they do choose us.

    And on some days: May the force be with you.

    Have a great weekend...

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  4. I hope that it was a decision and not a crazy accident, that I actually have a purpose and a destiny to fulfill. I loved Eat, Pray, Love and will check out Raising Cain since that rings of obvious necessity for me.

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  5. I read Mists of Avalon when I was a teen. God, I loved that book. It's been a looong time, perhaps I'll read it again to see if now that I'm past Maiden, mid-mother, nearly Crone it strikes me differently.

    Did you happen to watch the PBS series "Raising Cain?" It was really good - on in 2005; I watched it during the wee hours of the night as I sat nursing my newborn son.

    While I don't hold that belief, any time a challenge is presented, if I there is a reason I hold dear for meeting that challenge, I'm much more able to do so. I don't know sometimes, the difference between what I believe and what I use as incentives, or if it even matters if I do know.

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  6. Now see? You're just nicer and sweeter than I am. I came home to 3 sleeping kids in my family room last night. But my thought was more like "how the hell am I going to get them all upstairs"?

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  7. I read the Mists of Avalon in my teens. I'm not even sure where my copy is anymore. But you have me wanting to read it again with those comments.

    And yeah, I try to remind myself that about my kids choosing me. I also think that our children are given to us for a reason--to help us become better people and work on those virtues we most need to work on. Mine apparently is patience. :)

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  8. I wouldn't mention that idea to teenagers--you might find they want to make an exchange!

    Both books you have on your list is excellent. All mothers of boys should read everything by Michael Gurrian.

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  9. My sister-in-law has always said you get the children you're supposed to get (she has twin boys and all three of them almost died at their birth). I firmly believe that had my children appeared in all their personality and stubbornness in some of my friends' homes, they would have been roundly abused and squashed down.

    As to Mists of Avalon, forgive me if I've mentioned this before (because I have told at least 3 people this), go ahead and get "The Forest House" and "Lady of Avalon" which are the prequels to "Mists" (although written afterwards). I didn't get to it until well into my 30s, but I love it and reread it periodically.

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  10. I whole-heartedly believe that children choose their parents! I believe Tree Faerie has been with me for a while, just waiting for me to be ready.

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