Sunday, June 8, 2008

Well, EVERYONE toots


Favorite lines of the week:


While babysitting for someone else's child.... (I know...WHY?!)


As I was tucking in my friend's little 4 1/2 year old girl for the night:


Do you toot, too? - she asked me.


EXCUSE me? - I said.


She smiled. Then... Do you toot, too? - she asked me AGAIN.


Of course I toot. Everyone toots. It is perfectly normal.


So and so doesn't toot. They say they don't like to toot.


Well, EVERYONE toots. Everyone. Some families get embarrassed talking about it, but it is a perfectly normal thing that happens with your body. There's nothing wrong with it.


I can't keep it in. I can't help it. It just comes out. - she says with some concern.


Well, that's GOOD. You're stomach would hurt if it was stuck in there. Goodnight. Sleep tight. - Me, desperate to end this dialogue on farting. Most especially with someone else's child...


***********
BOY during the blessing slips in something like "and thank you for my trespasses."


Thank you for that blessing, BOY. Did you say trespasses?


My trespasses are delicate.


And so they are....

***********
Look, Mommy, my baby has beautiful brown eyes like you. - that's my GIRL.

I DON'T WANT TO GO TO BED!!! I'M NOT TIRED!!! I WANT TO LOSE MY PRIVILEGES!!
AND...that is my GIRL.

I better get to bed before I lose my privileges. Let's hope there are no toots.



**Comic courtesy of Google images.


submit to reddit

24 comments:

Lisa said...

Too funny!
My younger daughter thinks toots are just a riot--she loves to toot when I am reading her a story and then she just laughs and laughs lol!

delicate trespasses...hmmmmm not sure what to say on that and who wouldn't want to lose their privileges to stay up late ;)

Janet said...

I'm just laughing. I would love to hear the conversation if all four of our kids got together.

Memarie Lane said...

"One coughs when one must. Does not one?" -Mary Bennet

:P

HRH said...

That is very cute and funny. My favorite was thank you for my trespasses. I think if we all were thankful for those it would be a much funnier world.

Kellan said...

Adorable conversations - how cute!

Hope you had a good weekend - see you soon - Kellan

barbra said...

Good job on the "your tummy would hurt..." - very smart of you!

flutter said...

yeah TELL me about it!

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Oh, that GIRL is going to give you a run for your money!

AP said...

I've blogrolled you!

Don Mills Diva said...

I would just like to assert that I do NOT toot and you cannot prove otherwise...:-)

liv said...

ah, the tooting. good stuff.

Madge said...

my favoroite is "I want to lose my privileges!" so sweet.

Mrs. G. said...

I like to think all my trespasses are delicate. Can I borrow your kids for a couple of days? I need some good writing material.

Suzanne said...

Is there already a children's picture book by the title "Everyone Toots"? If not, I suggest you immediately begin writing....I see a picture book in your future.

BTW, this week I'm giving away a subscription to Budget Travel magazine as a further inspiration to The Grand Tour theme! Stop by and tell me where you want to go on your dream holiday.

Elizabeth said...

I believe there is an "Everybody Farts" book, and also "Everybody Poops". In our family, we "foof"
or when they are babies and there is a long stream...we refer to it as "pootering" (my Pediatrician got a kick out of that one).
My eldest daughter has been practicing burping the alphabet... now there's a talent that will take you places!!!
Blessings dear, EJT
PS, What tresspasses are delicate?

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

Oh my goodness, way too funny! I love that you are writing this stuff down, so precious to forget.

Jennifer H said...

These are so funny. "My trespasses are delicate" might be my favorite.

Angeline said...

I love your kids so much!!! They are such entertainers, you are one lucky mommy!

A Mom Two Boys said...

"Toots" always makes me giggle. The word, not the action.

Jen said...

"My tresspasses are delicate"?! WHAT?! Where did that come from?

And, sometimes, losing privileges is totally worth it.

painted maypole said...

i've heard that people toot on average 14 times a day

Tootsie Farklepants said...

And I can see the bubbles when Mr. Farklepants is sitting on the couch. That just doesn't seem right.

I'm glad you talked to that little girl about toots. Sounds like hers are being stifled.

Heather said...

I can just hear my daughter saying the same to me. She's gonna be stubborn just like her momma!

Purple Teacup said...

There are more toots in my house than I know what to do with. Such is life with 3 boys....

Copyright © 2007-2014 JCK.



The content on these pages is the sole property of the author and may not be used or reproduced in any manner without consent.

All Rights Reserved.