Tuesday, February 7, 2012

and I yearn for the elusive creamy center


I had a dream the other night that I was on stage again. Everything was fluid and lovely and there was a bow and applause and...a sense of self-satisfaction. As if balancing the yin with that yang, the dream continued and I went on stage the next night, stumbling with body and all lines of the script were gone to some distant land. A raucous success and a wild failure, somehow that seems apropos to life my husband said, when I shared the dream with him. Yes, it's true, but... wouldn't it be nice to have a creamy center once in a while?

When I was younger I was drawn to the drama - in men and friends. Life's moments were enhanced by complications. If something could be elevated or escalated, I would find it. I bemoaned the fact that I HAD SO MUCH DRAMA!! in my life to anyone who would listen. Smirk. What I couldn't live out on stage, was lived fully and at times dangerously close to the sharp edge of real life. Today, I see it sometimes in others, and I don't wish for that life anymore. Yet, my life seems full of highs and lows, and I yearn for the elusive creamy center.

So, I pull my children close to me. I tuck them in, rub sweet backs, and listen to their stories. Sometimes our life seems to swing up and ever down, but those little beats between the drama are my creamy center. I just need to remember that...

Participating with some amazing writers and the brainchild herself... Heather of the EO and her Just Write project.


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4 comments:

Heather said...

Oh yes. Me too.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

The older I get the less I can tolerate drama. It surprises me, too.

Aunt Snow said...

"The creamy center" - yes, this is what we need, isn't it? What a great way to put it.

Jen said...

I'd settle for a caramel center at this point. :)

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