Saturday, April 11, 2015

The unfurling of spring

You sowed your seeds long ago... yet each spring they bloom again. Take pleasure in the new growth, and be open to change.

You are never given just one chance. Do not give up if what you have planted doesn't take root. Often another seed from someone else's garden will drop in and blossom for years. 

Allow yourself a season of rest, as that is the way of all living things. Recognize when something won't thrive, prune off the dead growth, and let go of the cluster. Embrace each stage, and don't try to plant too many flowers at once. 

Sometimes, the greatest gift is when what flourishes is not something you planted. Trust in sunlight, and water and the miracle of every seed... all will manifest in your garden.

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Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Words are words whether they fly, drip or graze across the page

This space has sat empty with no one to tend the store. A ghost town of words flying by but never grasped, as tumbleweeds - flashes of inspiration quickly lost to the desert wind. 

Taking pen to the crisp, blank page, or keyboard to ...white space yawning into endless possibility. One way, a thousand ways, no one more important than the other. Words are words whether they fly, drip or graze across the page. Fleet of foot, a sense memory of a time when verbiage exploded outward because it couldn't be contained.

Where do they exist now? Behind bolted door? The creak of hinges grown rusty with disuse. 

Cloaking myself in a writer's hood I grasp tightly to that elusive star in the distance, that sweet spot, the pure, unadulterated joy of pushing words out into the ether. 

Hello world. Thanks for waiting for me.

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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

When the Blogger hits the road...

I'm Going to BlogHer '14!
Tomorrow I set out for BlogHer14. One amongst over three thousand other women (and men) who have a passion for writing on a blogging platform, I will soon feel the hum and energy of creative minds at work. Having been to two BlogHer conferences in past years, it is something to experience. This year marks BlogHer's 10th anniversary. Created and launched by three women to be reckoned with: Lisa Stone, Elisa Camahort Page and Jory Des Jardins, BlogHer has become an online platform enabling women's voices to be heard around the world.

When I started blogging in 2007, I was a stay-at-home mom. Often feeling isolated and alone, blogging enabled me to unleash my words upon the page and connect with other women. Some in similar life paths, some vastly different...yet all unique. Their words, and friendships, nourished and inspired me -both as a writer and as a mother.

Today I am on a different path - working full-time, always a mother and a sometimes blogger. I'm hoping to reignite my writing mojo and immerse myself in a community who share the love of sending words out in the world, because they've found nothing like it. Hello...JCK...welcome back!  Because blogging is like riding a bicycle, you never forget...

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Wednesday, April 2, 2014

from hot mama to chilled babe

JCK, do you know where your children are?! Yes, she does. JCK is full of glory. JCK is throwing all caution to the winds and letting her children watch a decadent hour of nonsensical cartoons. Now, in all fairness these cartoons are not nonsensical to JCK's children. But...then, children are children. Why are JCK's children planted in front of a large screen TV, eyes rolling around in their heads and brains on ...maintenance mode? Do, TELL JCK! Oh, what's that...a giggle and murmur from the duo? Hark! A conversation between them. This is the best they have gotten along in eons. Days. Hours. Weeks...

Meanwhile, JCK is stashed between piles of papers on her desk, a fan for her hot flashes and a heater for the recent cool temperatures descending upon S. California. JCK's not complaining. Her Modus operandi for the last 2 - 3 years has been dramatic swings of body temperature from hot mama to chilled babe. JCK can work up a sweat without running or walking or even...moving. Hot flashes, yeah! JCK will pause while you count your blessings.  ....pause, pause, pause...

And, then there are the recent conversations with mes enfants on agING.

Le Garçon : Mom, how old were you when you got married?

JCK: 34

Le Garçon : How old were you when I was born?

JCK: 42

Le Garçon : Wow! Wow! Wow! You were... OLD.

JCK smiling through her pain: Yep.

And then there was yesterday:

La Jeune Fille:There's this girl in Kindergarten. When you picked me up she asked if you were my grandmother. I said, 'No, she just has gray hair.'

JCK: So...she thought I was your grandmother? JCK has a slight COUGH...COUGH! 

La Jeune Fille nodding: Because you had gray hair.

JCK and La Jeune Fille both shaking their heads in WONDER at the naivety of a Kindergartner: tisk...tisk... 

Did JCK mention that Le Garçon spent several hours in the Principal's office last Friday? For drawing penises on figures in a copy of a friend's book...Diary of a Wimpy Kid.  There is nothing wimpy about penises, n'cest pas? Are they BORN penis focused?

Right when JCK was answering the call from the Principal... JCK's boss was emailing her multiple messages because she could not remember what her password was for the conference call. JCK is truly talented at multi-tasking. And, drinking caffeine. Whoosh...there goes another HOT FLASH. Just thinking about the last week has JCK flashing on and off like a traffic light in front of a ...liquor store. Hello, Jack Daniels...

On Monday, JCK's children didn't have school. That evening while JCK's brother and nieces stopped by for a visit, La Jeune Fille made a dramatic exit after dinner and emerged from her room bearing a pan of perfectly baked pumpkin bread that she and Le Garçon had baked ...themselves. In fact, while JCK's Mancake was out trimming a massive olive tree in the front yard, La Jeune Fille and Le Garçon had craftilly followed the directions on a boxed mix of pumpkin bread and baked a perfectly moist, delectable Pièce de résistance...even throwing in a few chocolate chips for inspiration.

Ooh la la...JCK is counting her blessings. She may be called to task on drawings of penises and blunt questions on aging, but JCK... she's a lucky gal. She's got children who question the world, bake on their own, and a MANcake that's calorie free. Red light. GREEN light. All night long...YO! YO! YO!

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Wednesday, February 26, 2014

I didn't imagine this as me...

I'm not sure how I arrived at this juncture in my work life. I find myself dining alone in my hotel reflecting upon a day of work, and how much my life has changed over the last 3 months. I am digesting more, much more, than my dinner. I didn't imagine this as me...

I have entered the world of business travelers -not something I am familiar with. It is odd to dine alone after so many years of marriage and a decade of children. I wonder if I appear as furtive as the other two solo diners here, checking their cell phones, faces illuminated in blue light, assuaged by their electronic dinner partners.

As I savor my glass of wine and dig into my steak, I am conscious of the table across the room. Two men with rounded bellies and loud guffaws, arms casually flung across the back of the booth, leaning in toward two women plump with laughter in girly, exaggerated pitch. Some things change, and some things remain the same. This scene has played out before.

It is pleasurable to sink back into my leather booth, watching the drama unfold outside, as the winter storm whips the trees and flings raindrops at the windows above the bar. It's been a long day and my brain is done. I will go back upstairs, dive into the comforts of a good mattress, and give myself the gift of sleep. Tomorrow I need sharpness and agility of mind to decipher this new job and all that it entails...

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