Well...I was actually pretty stunned at this

Earlier this morning...

So, the doubts are creeping in today. Both kids were dressed (on their own) and ready to go out the door just after 8am. They got in the car willingly. There was no talk of "I don't want to go to school." The drop off was seamless. BOY's teacher greeted him enthusiastically and he was happy to see her. GIRL held back for a second, but only over the decision to partake in a french toast breakfast or not. As I bent down to hug GIRL good-bye, we watched the other little girls in her class swirling around with long scarves. The room was full of happy children. I talked to her teacher. The Director had not told her yet that GIRL is leaving. So, the news came from me. She was very surprised and sad. "GIRL has been so happy here..." It is SO hard to be a grown-up and make the right decision for your children. It would be far easier to stay and hope things get better.

Then.... I was interrupted by the Director of the school calling me. She said that she just had to connect with me and ask us to give them another chance. To give the school a chance to make it right and to do things differently with BOY. To focus on all the things that he does. She was very clear that BOY would stay on a 1/2 day schedule indefinitely until all of us felt he was ready to be there a couple afternoons a week. She also wanted to let me know how happy he seemed to be and that they had noticed a major shift in him this week. She said that if we decided to move forward and take BOY & GIRL out of school that she respected what we felt we needed to do for our child, but she hoped we would stay.

Well...I was actually pretty stunned at this. And very pleased. This was major. I shared with her our reservations about what the teacher had said - that BOY had not progressed since September. The Director said that she could see how we could interpret this negatively, but she felt that the spirit in which it was made was not negative. That the teacher cared very much that BOY was happy at school and was having fun. I'm not sure how that could have been interpreted otherwise, but I reiterated that we want BOY to just be compared to himself and not to the other children. I then told her I appreciated her calling us and that I would call her back after E and I had a chance to talk together.

We called her back and E made it clear what our expectations are. That BOY not be pushed. That he is there to have fun. And that our concern is to have BOY in the right environment. She listened. She agreed. She said we could have regular meetings to discuss how he is doing. She said she was very hopeful and enthusiastic that this 1/2 day plan would work for BOY.

So, we agreed to give it a chance. I do think we owe them that. I wouldn't be saying that if BOY still appeared to be stressed at school or at home, but there has been a dramatic difference in his behavior over the last week. He has not been pushing the limits as much. He is laughing. And he is lighter in spirit. He has been BOY. Just as in any relationship, when you have been let down by someone, and they ask you to give them another chance...I think the mature thing to do is to let them do that. I think that the school has been visibly shaken by our intention to leave. And that has compelled them to make changes. I just heard from a friend, whose children are there, that the school will be having teacher in-services every 2 weeks with a child psychologist- checking in and making sure things are going well and that the expectations are appropriate.

When I picked up BOY after lunch, his teacher came over to me and apologized for any misunderstandings. She said that she cares for all the children and that they realize that they have made mistakes. She shared what a great day BOY had today and their number one priority is BOY's comfort level. I feel incredibly relieved, very hopeful, and exhausted.

Oh, and the BIGGEST news of the day. The mysterious disappearing POOP was found! Next to the swing set. Slow Panic can breathe a sigh of relief.... the dogs didn't eat it!

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