PROJECT: Office Annihilation & Creative Reconfiguration

I am SO excited. The time has finally come to...makeover our home office! It is something we've been talking about...well, ever since we moved in this house 8 years ago. We plan to add on at some point and the walls of the office will go down for the future addition, but ...you know what? Sometimes, it is good to enjoy the space that you do have and make it yours - rather than sitting around when the HELL is that DAY coming??!!!dreaming of "someday...someday." Kind of like when you gain weight and you punish yourself by not buying any new, fun clothes in your larger size because you tell yourself you'll fit back into your "skinny" clothes. And so you go around feeling like crapola never treating yourself to clothes that fit well and look good. Viva la Zaftig!! So, in the spirit of embracing what you DO have instead of thinking about what you don't have, I am ATTACKING the office. E and I both dream of a desk space that we can each call our very own. He is building us a desk and my job is to get the office CLEARED.

I am sure that you think I'm EXAGGERATING, per my usual, when I use the words "attack" and "clear." Unfortunately, NO. What I'm about to reveal to you is intensely personal. More difficult than putting myself in a bathing suit on the internets. Yes, what I am about to show you is like flipping my skirt up to reveal...that I'm not really a woman? No, not that. But... the no good, terrible, horrible, terrible truth is that I have let our office go. It's beyond SLOB. X 2 billion, trillion. Or is that 2 trillion, billion? Mommy Brain. Yeah...

And so...without further ado... please sit down, pour yourself a stiff one, and prepare to be SHOCKED, APPALLED, and INCREDULOUS. And I'm not just speaking of Jenn. Or, that Bad Mom revealing her deliciously clean tub in the interview by our dear, very own Mrs. G. I'm all of these ...shocked, appalled, and incredulous, but I drink. And eat chocolate. It helps. Usually.

OK, here is the desk space with books to the ceiling. We've got a few books. I adore being surrounded by books. My maternal grandparents always had a library and someday I hope we'll have one, too. A library....oooh, gets me all hot and bothered.

Another view revealing the printer and hinting of things under the shelves. Oh, yes...MUCH is below the shelves. The walls of the office are very WHITE. If we are up to the task, we will paint the office a color. I'm lusting for red.

This is a closer look at our shared computer area space. Lovely, I know. Just makes you want to CREATE. Doesn't it?

Then we have the file cabinet and a small bulletin board propped up. This is where my first rejection "letter" is posted, as well as other things related to Motherscribe. That pile on the chair? No idea.

Then just past the file cabinet we have boxes and bags full of paper to be shredded (from 1999.) As well as the infamous feather duster that I use as a boa. It looks a bit sad lying there all alone - hasn't been used in a while. We plan to turn this corner into a small reading nook. We'll put a comfy chair here to face the window, with a view of the backyard. This way we can see firsthand what trouble BOY & GIRL are attempting. Like a live video!Behind my chair are more book shelves and things that have run riot. Including the large bin of children's artwork. There is also my old easel (took up acrylic painting when I was going through IVF), which is covered in years of dust. To the right of that corner is a deep closet that we he will do and do and DO!...oops, I'm getting confused with Project: Fishnets redo. We plan to put the file cabinet in the closet and do shelves around it- giving us more floor space for the reading nook.

So, while I take on this monumental task...CAN SHE DO IT? YES! SHE CAN! So glad the Bob the Builder stage was quick and relatively painless...

E is building us a desk!

Here are the legs: just cut & shaped

...and after the stain. Notice the sweet curves. God, I wish I had gams like that! They might be a little distracting in the office...

And then here are the table tops. He is still doing the coats of stain, which is quite laborious. Perhaps most exciting of all, we will no longer be sharing a computer. No more ..."I need the computer" ,"No, I need the computer" ,"No, I really need the computer" ,"No, I really, really need the computer." It is done. No more Whaaaa WHaaaa, because...I am waiting for her to arrive. She of the red sheath, with cool keys and slim lines. My lovAH...

So, this is it...

Project: Office Annihilation & Creative Reconfiguration.

I could have called it Project: Office Redo, but why??

P.S. Now that you've seen my true underbelly, I'm sure you feel better about yourself. As you should.

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A book meme

I have just been tagged by Tootsie Farklepants with a book meme. She likes to torture me. Thank GOD it is simple. Because....well, it is Father's Day and I am worn out. The morning was lovely with an amazing church service and breakfast out with two children exhibiting excellent manners. Truly stunning! I guess the hot chocolate and pancakes with syrup helped a bit. Later, trying to keep the same two small children from using their father as a bounce house ...especially when the father in question was trying to watch...shhhhh...the sacred, the holy ...the mighty game of GOLF! YAWN...YAWN.. But, hey, it's Father's Day and all dads should be so indulged. Love ya, baby! We all survived and now I am going to tackle this book meme.

The rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged you.


Small dimensional changes either way will alter the final size dramatically.

I first experimented with 1 1/2"-wide boards for the clock ring, but found it wasn't deep enough for the clock hardware I used. Once again, I suggest purchasing the hardware before cutting, to be sure the interior depth is suitable.

Now what exactly is this book you ask? Some mechanical sex manual by my bedside? True, depth is mentioned multiple times, but a "clock ring" should not be confused with that other C ring. No...these inspiring and stimulating sentences come from the book "The Pocket Hole Drilling Jig Project Book"by Danny Proulx.

My husband and I share...much. Including a desk. His book was the closest! Somehow seems apropos on Father's Day.

Happy Father's Day to you and yours!

And I tag you wild and wooly women with this same book meme:

Adventures in the 32-Aker wood

The Happy Geek

Mama Milton

Rants & Raves

The Reluctant Blogger

Um...try to keep it clean, ladies.

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It's now JackO'Clock, and all's well!

Holly the hipster over at June Cleaver Nirvana has tagged me with the 6 word memoir meme. Holly has a very twisted sense of humor, because she thinks I can actually be brief... which is like her, insanely funny. But, we can all use friends who cut us off ...at the mouth.

6 word memoir meme...of sorts.

When at a loss, buy lipstick.

Tired of dabbling, want to write.

Caffeine, chocolate, whiskey; sometimes it helps.

Becoming a mother, most monumental event.

Still exploring myself, within and without.

It's now JackO'Clock, and all's well!

Marriage still passionate, despite 2 additions.

Parenting a challenge, reward and mystery.

Eager to see, where life leads.

Once an actress, now a blogger.

Writing daily, helps keep me sane.

Blessings of children; delightful, precious, indescribable.

Thirteen years of marriage, still growing.

Learning balance, every hour, every day.

Family support, of that I'm blessed.

Snuggling on children, never get enough.

Husband kind heart, and scrumptious ass.

Children teach us, moment to moment.

Those fishnet days, not many regrets.

I'd like to pass this 6 word memoir meme on to the following linguistic lovelies:

MamaGeek
Katydidnot
Minnesota Matron
Slouching Mom
She's just another manic mommy
Don Mills Diva

And also to these women, who are new to me, wielding words upon the page:
A Golden Journal
coffeeyogurt
The Philosopher Mom

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all about me meme - links to 5 posts

That woman who drives a kamikaze minivan, HRH, over at June Cleaver Nirvana has tagged me for " It's all about me: links to 5 posts" meme. I will do my best, Missy. Please know that I can't be responsible for the following choices as I am currently in severe chocolate withdrawal as a certain husband forgot to arrive home last night with the requested stash. True, the weather is doing a good imitation of a tropical monsoon, and he would have had to brave the fierce elements, but COME ON! I mean what IS really important here? I guess I should have put a big note around his neck to remind him. "WIFE DESPERATE FOR CHOCOLATE." A reminder to keep the wife ....satisfied. Or ELSE!

It's all About Me meme: linking 5 of my posts (pull up a chair, perhaps a chaise lounge...and a big bottle of the good stuff and settle in...)

RULES:

1) Acknowledge the person who tagged you. Thanks, HRH! (yeah...thanks a LOT ...only took me 4 friggin' hours to come up with these gems of blathering prose...)

2) Tag other blogging SISTUHS and leave a comment on their blog letting them know that you have tagged them.

3) Go back through your archives and post the links to five favorite blog posts that you have written.

But there is a catch:
Link 1: must be about family.
Link 2: must be about friends.
Link 3: must be about yourself, who you are… what you’re all about.
Link 4: must be about something you love.
Link 5: can be anything you choose.

And so here I go:

Link 1 (family): No stinky butts, a few jellyfish and beauty thy name is swimming pool captures some of the adventures we had visiting my mom on an island in the Gulf of Mexico, this past summer.

Link 2 (friends): Grown-up time is good describes a well needed dinner party with friends, well sort of ...there was some interference by small children.

Link 3 (who am I anyway?): Saved by the perpetual neglect of the unfolded laundry, I think, gives a glimpse into who I am.

Link 4 (what I love): These are a few of my favorite things, inspired by Mrs. G, gave me an opportunity to list A LOT of things I love. Warning...the post doth go on and on...

Link 5 (anything): We made it. Barely... is the story of me traveling with both children last summer, alone, on 2 airplanes relatively unscathed (depending on your perspective) only to reach the break-down point at the Jacksonville Airport around midnight...

You are it!!! RimaRama, AMomTwoBoys, Slouchingpast40, RantsandRaves, WorksforMom, and SlowPanic.

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8 Things meme or how to OVERtax one's brain by being a good girl

O.K., I was tagged by the lovely Lisa, Mama Milton , for a meme oh..so loooong ago. And since I tend to procrastinate, shall we say, over doing these memes... Look, I don't even know how to pronounce the word meme. That's how bad it is around here. And after I do a meme, I always remember something else that is so incredibly OBVIOUS that I've forgotten to list it. But, here goes anyway:

8 Things I'm passionate about:

1. My husband and my children...they have the ability to fill my heart, sometimes break my heart, and yet they nourish me and are my teachers.


2. Chocolate... anywhere, anytime, off of any surface...well maybe not the floor - wait ... 5 second rule!


3. Clean underwear....no explanation necessary.


4. Books, books and did I say...BOOKS? I love words, the curve of a sentence, the way it wraps around you...


5. .... [this is called...the ellipsis.....]


6. Sharpened pencils.....mmm...inhale...post-its, sharpies, legal pads...basically any office supplies will do, reminds me of a fresh start - new school year.


7. Taking candid pictures of my children...they always surprise me and the camera, I love how the picture you didn't know was there is there!


8. Movies in the movie theater...from what I can remember it is where you get to sit in the dark, and immerse yourself in a story that sweeps you up, shown on a large screen.

8 Things I want to do before I die [this strikes me as incredibly morbid, but WHATever]:

1. Have a romantic vacation with just my husband... this will require ingenuity, money, leaving children with some sappy soul, and finding a place with no television - all of which seems insurmountable at the present time.


2. A trip to Scotland to do a roots tour [no I am not descended from Kunta Kinte, that would be if I was from Africa, which I'd like to be, but am not.]


3. Have grandchildren...well, it IS possible...maybe, let's see if BOY has a child at 29 I will be in my 70's, a mere spring chicken.


4. Spend at least a month in France and Italy...who wouldn't?


5. Go back to visit Lebanon...a place of many special memories and left so quickly all those years ago.


6. Have "a room of one's own"...studio space with natural light for painting, writing and a chaise lounge for reading and lounging- oh, and my own computer & desk!


7. Know that my children have grown into happy, loving, peaceful adults wanting to make a difference in the world. [LOOK, I've run out of "to do's," O.K.?]


8. Have published something...a poem, a story, a sentence, anything will do.

8 Things I say often:

1. Actually, ....
2. Apparently, ...
3. That's really cool [O.K., I'm embarrassed, but I say it...OFTEN]
4. O.K., ...
5. You're going to lose your privileges! [yes, this is what I say to E every night]
6. Would you like to earn some privileges? [what I say to E every morning]
7. TIME OUT!!! [A useless exercise in futility, but time-outs are really for me, anyway.]
8. No way! [Still embarrassed]

8 books I've read recently [hahahaha....I'm changing this to 8 of the 12 books I have stacked next to my bed, some I'm reading, some I intend to read.]

1. Conversations with Erica Jong [a collection of interviews, that I'm just diving into] - edited by Charlotte Templin


2. Bel Canto by Ann Patchett - this was a great read!


3. The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley - half-way through!


4. Today Matters: 12 daily practices to guarantee tomorrow's success by John C. Maxwell - GOD knows I could use some guarantees!


5. Positive Discipline for Preschoolers by Jane Nelsen, E.d.D., Cheryl Erwin, M.A., and Roslyn Duffy - positive....positive...GO TO YOUR ROOM NOW YOU BAD BOY!...positive, positive...maybe it will rub off.


6. Are Men Necessary: When sexes collide by Maureen Dowd - a must read, just for the controversy.


7. Last Child in the Woods: Saving our children from Nature-Deficit Disorder - a fascinating book that weighs heavily, and that's just the introduction.


8. Raising your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka - all kidding aside, I LOVED this book - need to get the updated edition that came out in 2006 or this year.

8 Songs I can listen to over and over:

1. Tall trees in Georgia by Eva Cassidy


2. Building a Mystery by Sarah McLachlan


3. You're so Vain by Carly Simon


4. You've got a Friend by Carole King


5. Magic Man, Crazy on You, Kick it Out, Dog & Butterfly by Heart


6. Perfect Fit by Van Morrison


7. Crazy by Seal


8. Any song by Joni Mitchell period.

8 things that attract me to my best friends:

1. Laughter, humor & wittiness


2. Ability to gab and gab and gab and gab...and gab...and gab


3. Kindness


4. Generosity


5. Being from another country and culture


6. Someone who is not afraid of my tears


7. Heavy drinkers [it helps them with #8]


8. A good listener

8 People who should TOTALLY do this meme [if you don't want to do it, that's NOT O.K.-- I mean it's fine, fine!, I'll just have to come over and do some blog ass kicking]:

Johanna at Inside Out

Attack of the Redneck Mommy

Liv at madness, madness i say

Kellan at On the Upside

Professor J at Professor J's Place

Janet at Adventures in the 32-Aker Wood

Bub and Pie

And then I have to make special mention of Tootsie Farklepants who tagged me for a Christmas meme that I failed to do. Tootsie, my dear sexy woman, I have failed you and I am sorry. Every time I started to do the Christmas meme, and I tried several times [I swear on my chocolate smeared keyboard pad!!!] I kept hearing:

I do not like them in a house.

I do not like them with a mouse

I do not like them here or there.

I do not like them anywhere.

I do not like Christmas memes. I do not like them Ms. Farklepants.

Basically, I'm just lazy. But, I do like you and so I magnificently tag you...Ms. Tootsie with the Farkle in her pants. [See this is what happens when I do memes!! I completely, totally lose my mind. Now, of course there is NO PRESSURE for you to do the meme. Just wanted to lob something back over to you, girl. Your serve!]

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NaBloPoMo - Day 21- a meme of 7 random or wierd things

The lovely Mountain Mama over at Careful What you Wish For has tagged me for a meme. Mountain Mama was the first one to welcome me to NaBloPoMo, and she did it in that fabulously, warm Australian way. (For those of you following my story, you simply must go over to her site. The story of how she became a Mama is truly miraculous.)

So, here are the meme rules:

1) Link to the person that tagged you, and post the rules on your blog.

2) Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself.

3) Tag 7 random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs.

4) Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

And since you all have been breathlessly waiting for my 7, here goes:

7 RANDOM AND/OR WEIRD FACTS ABOUT ME:

1) In my 20's I worked for the Eastern Onion Singing Telegram company as a variety performer. Could I sing? No. But, that was the entertainment. I performed an array of characters from Fifi Ze French Maid to Officer Goodbody...(in my 20's y'all, in my 20's)...to Sadistic Sadie (skintight leopard costume & whip included.) One of my favorite characters was The Preggo Gram. Basically you'd show up somewhere, frequently some corporate office, and go off into a tirade on some poor sot whose misfortune was to have this thrust upon him. He was accused of knocking me up in front of the entire office. The venues were anywhere and everywhere. A couple of times I did them in the stands at the Atlanta Braves Stadium on national television. Yes. I did. *sigh* Those were the days....

2) I LOVE licorice. Not the red kind. That is NOT licorice. That is candy. The only true licorice is black. And the best kind I've had lately is from, of course, Trader Joe's.

3) I have huge ears. They practically flap. I tried a sexy, short haircut once. It didn't work. The ears were THERE. My ears are so big that sometimes when I am sleeping the top of my ear gets bent and I wake up with a sore ear for hours.

4) This home is the longest place I've ever lived in. It has been 7 1/2 years. Before this house I lived in 27 previous homes or apartments. That is 27 moves since I was born. This is not including various hotels in-between moves. I have lived in Lincolndale, NY; Westport, CT; Mogadishu, Somalia; Beirut, Lebanon; Dover, NJ; Atlanta, GA; Tallahassee, FL; New York City, NY; and Southern California. Each place had magic. Lebanon is forever in my heart. Just north of Los Angeles is finally where I feel at home.

5) I adore books. My maternal grandparents, who retired in Virginia, had a room in their home that was called The Library. And it was. And so much more. I aspire to have that someday in my fantasy house. I was in the Library Club when I was in 8Th grade. Yes, the Library Club. [We were hotties hovering over the card catalogue.] I currently have library cards for 3 different regions within a 20 mile radius.

6) I hate sugar substitutes! Any of that fake, chemical stuff. Bad for me. Bad for you. Don't do it. Am proud. Nothing like real sugar flowing through the blood stream.

7) I have several boyfriends. You're not the only one, by GOD, Mrs. G! E knows about it. [Well, not about Mrs. G.] He's cool with it. The line-up includes: Viggo, Josh, Ralph, Russell, and many, many others ...but, who has time to list them all??

Are you still awake? Good. So, I was going to leave this up to you....if anyone would like to participate in the meme, please do. Just let me know that you did it, as I would love to come over and read about YOU. And now I tag the following ladies: From the Frontlines, The Happy Geek, Ziff-Niffer, Mom of 6 Malloy Boys, Mama Milton, All Adither, and...Kind of Crunchy Mama.

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