Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Will I remember it


Will I remember it,
this life we have now
moments in a day
long passed.

When I measured them
against a doorjamb
with pencil, a ruler
and pink measuring tape.

Each rushing to be
the first one
Me First! No, Me!
But, it's MY turn.

When I said it was not quite
time for me to say good-bye and
she said she wanted to hug me
just because she wanted to.

When I overheard their battle
he shouting, I'm leaving
and she said, filled with hope
To Africa!?

The many nights of losing sleep
because he came into our room
yet once, after a night out
gasping, Mom, you're home!

The push and pull of asking
for help or NOT
Mommy, will you tie this in a bow
...I can do it MYSELF!

Seeing the metamorphosis from
tentative to self-confident
painstakingly slow...and
then like quicksilver.

Stepping on train tracks
strewn carelessly
across the floor, out the door
and to his imagined beyond.

Her small hand tucked in mine
so soft, so very soft
the tiny fingers growing
bigger every day.

The way he threw his arms
around his swimming teacher
topped off with a kiss
upon her shoulder.

Pretending to fly with them
running and flinging ourselves
upon the couch, tummy first
muscles screaming, yet worth it.

The cadence of her voice
filling the room
as she "reads" aloud
for her own pleasure.

His blessing at dinner
thanking God for us
for his grandparents
and the homeless woman.

The hours they spent
in make-believe lives
playing together and
needing no one else.

Will I remember sitting here
on the edge of his bed
small, overturned shoes
cradling my tired feet.

A boy not yet ready
for me to leave
him alone, eyes closed
to his unknown dreams.

A girl attuned to his every sound
lying in her bed, across from his
deep breaths stirring in the dark.

They are my children, these two
one a boy, on his way to five
and a girl almost four
two of them, ten months apart...

Will I remember it,
this life we have now
Oh Yes! in every fiber,
every cell, of my being.





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25 comments:

Ginaagain said...

That was beautiful. Thank you.

Lisa said...

That was really good--you need to send it to poet mag; it will get published!

Sober Briquette said...

I think I will, too, even though I am already forgetting the names of things, words that won't come to me, but these small moments of beauty - I hope so.

Thanks.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

You will all remember.

BOSSY said...

Wow. And meanwhile Bossy is posting about potato chips. Thanks for elevating Teh Internets!

Janet said...

Yeah, I'm with Bossy. The most poignant I can get is when I only put up pictures.

JJ the laundress has a post on this theme today. *sigh* How is it that they grow so fast even when we're right here the whole time?

Lisa Milton said...

In our cells, yes. I'm still always startled when I see pictures of the kids, when they were so little.

Goes too fast.

(Wah. Been weepy lately.)

Kellan said...

This was beautiful J - and reminded me of all the things I long to never forget!!

Have a good day - Kellan

flutter said...

really lovely

MamaGeek said...

Wow. This was delicous.

phd in yogurtry said...

Stepping on train tracks
strewn carelessly
across the floor, out the door
and to his imagined beyond.


love it
the best part is, we get to remember with you : )

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

Wow, beautiful writing. I am in this moment, touched and jealous of your ablility!
Thank you for sharing.

Madge said...

you will remember. you'll remember every stage.

Manic Mommy said...

I'm feeling sorry for myself today. Thanks for counting my blessings when I could not.

Minnesota Matron said...

Oh, shivers. I will remember in my cell and skin. Sometimes not the brain, so it's good to know other parts of the body retain. Beautiful!

Denise said...

This made me count my blessings today. Thank you!

Jennifer H said...

Beautiful. There's so much of motherhood in this.

g said...

Sweet!

Hen said...

Lovely!

Angeline said...

Gasp! This is truly beautiful! Camera's can capture moments but the emotions of those moments live in our hearts forever...

Jen said...

Beautiful. Yes, you will remember it in general but some of the specifics would be lost, if you didn't write them all down!

Jen said...

P.S. I mentioned you in my newest post and sent you some linky love. Just what you need - more readers - to NOT read and comment to.

Jen said...

P.S. I mentioned you in my newest post and sent you some linky love. Just what you need - more readers - to NOT read and comment to.

Suzanne said...

You wrote this! I'm sorry I had no idea that you are a poet! I agree, you need to send this out for publication.

The last stanza in particular reallly, reallly, tugged my heartstrings.

Mama P said...

That was beautiful. You have captured much of what I have been feeling lately. I wrote a post just tonight on it, but you wrote it much more eloquently. I look forward to meeting you at Blogher.

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