I truly believe that children come into our world with their own uniqueness

If you've been reading me for a while, you'll know that I often talk about the gifts that my children have brought into my life. Most notably, just themselves...as they are. I also talk about one of the bonuses of having children so close in age is that I can see the striking differences in personality at the same ages. Those books on your child at 1, 2, 3, 4, etc., all have their place, and often are "right on," but I have found that BOY & GIRL are more different than alike. Especially in how they do things and view the world.

BOY likes to jump right in, meet new people, experience a novel place, and do things a little differently from "the norm." He learns while moving. He will fool you every time when you think he hasn't taken something in, OH...but he HAS. And, he chooses when to let you in on it. He is clever that way.

GIRL is an amazing observer. She loves a good conversation. She watches. Everything down to the smallest detail goes in, assimilates in her brain and then she can explain to you what she has seen. She is quick to memorize and repeat things verbatim back to you. For the most part, she draws comfort and enjoys doing things "the right way." She takes charge and nothing slips her notice.

BOY has no boundaries. He will walk up to a stranger and throw his arm around their leg or pat someone's tummy and greet them. Everyone is a friend and people are charmed by his openness. Having some boundaries is something we will have to work on with him.

GIRL has very firm boundaries. She is reserved and cautious when she first meets someone and is able to make some adults uncomfortable with what we like to call her 500 yard stare. She is an old soul and it can feel like she sees through you. She has good, healthy boundaries and our work with her is to acknowledge people upon greeting and to encourage her to put that amazing vocabulary that she owns to good use. She is thoughtful and analytical.

Because of, or perhaps someday in spite of...their differences, they get along like gangbusters! The first two years were all about running, but now they play together so well and I am continually struck by their creative play and how they complement each other. Of course there are those days...everyone has them. But, secretly...I feel so lucky that I'm out of the diaper stage and on to the ongoing discovery of who these little people are, whom I love so much.

I say all this with confidence, yet I do know that they may change on a dime. Isn't that what half of parenting is? Being able to move, duck and cover with the mercurial changes in one's children? Yet, I am always fascinated by the discussion of NATURE VS. NURTURE.... Having both an adopted child and a biological child has caused me to weigh in heavily on the NATURE side of things. I truly believe that children come into our world with their own uniqueness. We may help shape and guide them, but they are their own little people. And, they never let us forget it...


***Picture courtesy of Google Images

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